Rose too early after staying up too late. Talked about the Cat and pitched a fit because the sunflowers got mowed down. Again. Harumph
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Re: illegitimate offspring. It may be a victory for political correctness that the word bastard has fallen by the wayside and isn’t much heard anymore. The Cook’s joke with the unspoken punch line was a variant of a joke very prevalent in the military: “Don’t call me ‘sir.’ My parents were married to each other.” So the joke has fallen by the wayside for two reasons, the first being that “bastard” isn’t common usage anymore, and the second being that few US children enter the military anymore and would be more likely to have heard the joke. In a similar fashion, the word bitch to describe a female canine has fallen out of common usage, but is still common usage to describe a female human, particularly in the black community.